This painting was pretty emotional for me really.
When I made this I started off dark colors using black and deep red oil paints. In that moment I realized subconsciously I was choosing these colors because I was in a dark place mentally.
Smearing these two colors around and around not even knowing how to use oil paints but just feeling it and how this feeling related to me.
I allowed this painting to sit outside alone on my balcony for a few days. Checking on it , not knowing what to do with it, not knowing if I wanted to do anything with it.
A reflection of myself.
1 whole month it took me to finally face this darkness, this deep red mixed with black and bring it to the light.
Slowly touching the surface with neon fluorescents and things to glow within the dark.
I allowed these colors to fall onto this painting without thought, without judgment and watched a face evolve from within; from the hardest stroke to the lightest..these are all reflections of myself or maybe someone else who may have felt the same way that I did..in that moment.
The light within will always find its way through the darkness. You just have to face that darkness even when it’s horrifying.
16 x 20
Oil paint and neon acrylics